Thinking

Far too much thinking going on. Must be mid life crisis time. To be considering what is really important in life, what do I really want and do I really have the get up and go to make sweeping changes?

Is true joy and happiness in every day life actually accessible? Particularly with the state the world is in these days. Ponder, ponder and ruminate. If I don't have the discipline to get up early two days in a row to exercise, do I have the discipline to create a different kind of life?

I don't have any answers I'm afraid, but will continue to ask the questions anyway...

Habits.

Most people are creatures of habit. Mornings tend to go the same way, in the same order each morning, family rituals are basically habits peculiar to a particular group. 

Breaking habits can be incredibly difficult and making new ones seemingly impossible.

Giving up smoking is something that I've finally kicked...again. But it's been 51 days and I think the worst is over. 

It's probably my age (44eeek) but I'm feeling dissatisfied with my life and feeling the need to make some changes. Don't get me wrong, I wouldn't change my family for the world, hubby and daughter are the centre of my life. It is what I have managed to achieved in my 44 yrs that disappoints me I guess. I always felt capable of more but never had the drive or any idea of what I wanted to do really, so I drifted into this and that.

I've done ok, I have a pretty good job that I'm actually pretty good at, but I dream of different.

So I'm trying something different, little things at first.

Getting up earlier and making some time for me; some meditation, some exercise, some changes in habits. I'll keep you updated on how it goes.

I conquered Mt Washmore! Or at least until next week.

Well after however many weeks since we got back from the very lovely New Zealand, I finally got all the washing folded and put away. Sure I've got another load in the washer and another drying but 4 loads clean, folded and put away I call success. No more scrounging through the wash basket for clean undies and matching socks yayyyy!

A loaf of bread made, and as the 14yo daughter is on camp for the next two days, it may just last longer than two days. Isn't it pretty? 

This recipe makes such a lovely sandwich and toasting loaf and only takes about an hour.

1 HOUR LOAF

5 1/4 cups bread or strong flour

2-4 tbs sugar ( I use a scant 2)

1 1/2 tsp salt

1 1/2 rounded tbs instant yeast

1 1/2 tbs oil

2 cups warm water 

1. Mix dry ingredients

2. Add oil and water to make a sticky dough

3. Knead for 5 minutes

4. Shape into loaves, I make one big one.

5. Cover with a teatowel and leave to rise for 25-30 min

6. Preheat oven to 180 degrees celcius

7. Slash top of loaves to allow expansion and bake for 25-30 min or until golden brown 

Cheese!!!!

Our cheese making efforts for last weekend, hoping in a few weeks we get a yum farmhouse cheddar for the lunches. Harder than it looks to keep the temp to 32 degrees but hopefully it turns out.

Packing the curds into the basket.

The absurdity of piling my kettlebell and hand weight to reach the requisite 10kg.

Which tipped over overnight leaving a slightly odd shaped cheese.

On the plus side we also ended up getting some ricotta out of the leftover whey! Nom nom nom ricotta-filled ravioli!

Kitchen crazy

Well we had an absolutely lovely day with a visit to an open day at a local community garden. It was buzzing, literally, with bees as well as people. We bought a stack of seedlings for our vege garden, I see lots of summer tomatoes in my future, nom, nom, nom.

When we came home I made some more bread and rolls plus some cha lua for sandwiches. The husband marinated some pork belly and cooked that up too. It looks delish!  

Dreaming Tiny

I guess you get to a certain time in your life when you wish it was simple. Juggling bills and loan repayments, thinking about whether you will have enough money to retire on when you can't seem to save enough for a holiday. Or if the hot water system blows, how will you pay for it.

Working full time and managing financially ok but just ok, treading water...  Living reasonably well but are we really living. Like that old adage "work to live or live to work".

We dream of self sufficiency, living on the fruit and vegetables we grow, the eggs from our chooks and harnessing solar power. Living on a suburban block we have the chooks and vegetables going, our 12 or so espaliered and dwarf fruit trees are yet too small to fruit, and the solar power gives us some savings on the electricity bills. 

But we want more....or actually less..

We talk about land somewhere and a tiny house. Wind and solar power, composting toilet, fruit trees, veges and goats, making our own cheeses and bread, preserving what we grow.

But how? Are two people who grew up in the burbs cut out for going country? I honestly don't know. I'd like to try but once again it comes down to $ and permanent employment. Even if we sell up everything it wouldn't last long. Sure we could buy land and a little house and set ourselves up with a bit left over but country towns aren't known for employment opportunities and I think total self sufficiency is a bit of a myth. Money is still needed for some things.

Well I'm going to bed and dream a little more of my tiny house....maybe dreams can come true....

Mount Washmore

Two large baskets of washing needing folding, one frozen shoulder and a total lack of interest in said folding. This can only mean one thing. 

I will be digging out underwear from the yet to be folded basket yet again tomorrow morning. Note the use of the word ... again...